When you get pulled over by Bill Burr. Driver: Just riding and. Officer: Running his license plate. Why are you speeding? Driver: I was only going 60. Officer: Speed limit is 40. Look at the signs. Okay. Bye. Oh give me the weed too. Driver: No, I I have a Oh oh oh yeah, I have a medical marijuana card. Officer: Step out. Driver: I have a car. Step
Didn't god know what was going to happen? You die and then you go up to get judged, right? God pops in the DVD, like, 'Well, I don't know about this right here. Mind explaining yourself?'. This might be the most arrogant thing I say all night, but I actually resent the fact that I'm going to get judged someday. Like if that's true, if somebody's go
They Don't Make Homeless Like They Used To... I'm just warning you because they don't make homeless people the way they made them when I was a kid. You know? When I was a kid, a homeless guy was a bum. He was a vagrant. Somebody down on his luck or whatever, you know, a wino. They didn't have this Shutter Island shit going on that they had out ther
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